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The
Winking Caveman (Misprint) Dorothy Please Trim Your Hinge (Misprint) The Premature Ejaculation Waltz Down By The Riverside The Yodelling Winker (Misprint) All Of These Things Are Soul Ukulele Lady Two Thirds Of Four Fifths The Son Of John Thomas Allcock My Baby Loves My Yorkshire Pudding Bonkola featuring The Mighty JUDGE DREAD You Can't Have A Shag With A Snowman All I Want For Christmas (Is A Great Big Dong) The Sailors In The Gents (Humorous Monologue) extra bonus... Live in Croydon I Feel Like Winking (Misprint) Ivor Biggun Is My Name Cats On The Rooftops I'm Looking Over A Four-Leaf Clover The Filthy Limerick Mambo I Have A Dog His Name Is Rover The Winker's Song (Misprint) (Rotten version) |
| Ivor Biggun
has been offending good taste and Mary Whitehouse (RIP) since Sir johnny
Rotten (VIP) declared his debut, "The Winker's Song (Misprint)",
single of the week back in the dark ages. Born the son of John Thomas Allcock
and the nephew of George Formby's ukulele tech (allegedly), Ivor Biggun
was destined for a life in showbiz. However, it wasn't until 1972,
while cruising the Caribbean as trombonist with Lord Crabs and The Clam
Divers, that the epiphany that was to shape his destiny occurred. Charles Edward ‘Chuck' Berry was the poet laureate of rock ‘n' roll with his compositions covered by spotty English boys with bad hair and tight trousers. Despite decades of critical acclaim the white boys always had more success so Chuck was forced to reveal his insight into the true source of teen gratification, that which goes beyond cars and girls. He exposed his secret weapon, the song no pretentious pansies could ever cover and, with "My Ding-a-ling", w*nking was finally on the lyrical agenda. The public made it Chuck's only No.1 smash hit and Ivor, a natural born w*nker, was inspired. Diverted by his packed schedule, it wasn't until 1978 that Ivor finally followed Chuck into the top 21 with "The Winker's Song (misprint)" and a career in briefs followed with three albums of frivolous filth (unashamed plug - highlights are available on the compilation "The Fruity Bits of Ivor Biggun"). Ivor went on gardening leave in 1987 to grow rude shaped vegetables only to resurface 18 years later with sticky hands and a brand new album (in fancy packaging with a 12 page booklet featuring nubile Germans). So what, dear reader, will convince you of the benefits of Handling Swollen Goods? Should we tell you it's Ivor's most consistent and musical opus yet with a mere four songs about masturbation? He now sings of his other interests like domestic animals, shagging, shitting and shaving? The songs are performed in a clutch of genre defying styles embracing soul, country, calypso, gospel, oom-pah, mambo, Hawaiian and electro-pop and all are as infectiously catchy as… ok, let's not go there. Plus, there are 2 stonking Christmas songs that every office party should enjoy and employ. Then there's the bonus live recordings - Ivor on his worst behavior. Let's just say the 21 tracks are stuffed with ribald, absurd and creative rhymes, the mundane and profane elevated beyond Python, vaudeville and Williams McGonagall and Shakespeare. Guaranteed to disgust, you need Ivor to brighten up your life. |
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